Fond of Moo and Everything Under the Sun

Would a man with a giant head (And when I say giant, I mean giant, like super duper huge) would this guy, let's be bold and say his name is Rutherford, if he had a teeny tiny little neck, would he always be toppling over like a mad-man? Oh dear I hope not. Green! Some people hate, some people love. Some people even love to hate it, am I right? How many frick fuck children do you think Lady Madonna had? And another question? DID she ever make ends meet? I don't know but she is totally like the octomom of song. I wish that was my title, but instead of song, it was soul. LLE: the Octomom of soul! I like it. Everyone call me that, k? Thanks a bunch lassholes! Where was I shnukem brains? Oh yeah, in Candyland. Hey! Remember that big chocolate monster in candyland? What was that bastards name? I kinda really heally peally want to eat him right now. Next time your at your local theater, be a doll and pick one of those guys up for me you turtle monsters! Fond fond fond fond. Why can't she ver just say "FOND OF FUCKING POOP!?" Wait a tec. Do you think that means having sexual relations with poop? If so, ewww. I am UNfond of that. Or am I? Ooh, I'm so naughty! Naughty like those kids that Santa hates. He's so biased that fat bastard! And anyone else can't sleep at night knowing that that fat man is just sitting over at his pole staring at you? I know I can't. He freakity freaks me oouut. Wanna know a delicious secret?
Are you ready for this shocker? I don't think you are yet.
Okay I'll say it.
This is not Lauren.
It's Yogi Bear.
It's actually Oli bitchez!

Fond of Macaroni

Long time no see! Gosh, don't be strangers. What's that you say? I'M the one who's been gone. How dare you make such an accusation! Little 'ol me had a BIG 'ol government test this week. You know how it goes. Let me tell you about the time I went to Jupiter. Boy was that a good trip! I ate anti-gravity cotton candy (believe me, that was no easy task), and floated around the surface. Surprisingly, there is lots of macaroni and cheese on Jupiter. Why are some words that are the same spelled differently? Not like there/their/they're, like capital/capitol, medal/metal. It's weird, isn't it? Who decided which spelling is for which meaning? I'd like to get a good look into that guy's brain. I bet you he feels really accomplished for making such important decisions. Why didn't they just come up with new words? Or spell both meanings the same way. It would be confusing, yeah, but really make more sense. Which meaning/spelling came first? Okay this blog has taken me about 4 hours of off and on concentrating and my brain is a little fuzzy and my eyes are itchy and yeah. That's my way of telling you goodbye.
So long, space cadets! -Lauren

Fond of Remodels

So I've decided to rename my blog "Forum of Fondness." I've done this for no other reason than that is what my blog has become. Oh, and I love alliteration. So, swish it around, see how it tastes, and let me know. Wait, don't let me know, I've already done it anyways. Now then, lets move on. I've been sick for the last couple of days, and I'm still feeling nothing short of awful, so I'm going to make this brief. Oh, I hear my little sisters listening to The Beatles down the hall. There's almost nothing I'm fond of more than my boys John, Paul, George, and Ringo! Okay, me and my spen (that's a spoon and pen morphed into one fantastically functional utensil!) are going to attempt to mend the relationship between studying and having clouds for brains. 
To infinity, and beyond! -Lauren
P.s. I updated the blog-writer-thingy and it looks like it lacks my usual choice of font color, so here's the new one!

Fond of EVERYTHING

Hello!!!! Hello again!!! Hello again again!!! PEEYA! Poop poop pee pee. Yum.

SLYTHERIN! Am I right? Yeah I am. Tthat's fantastic! Dun Dun Dun! Giraffes! Elephants! Mr. E. Phant. Mrs. G. Raff. Apoohaha! So the other day I was running and running and running and I saw this Turtle and he said hey Oli what's up? And I was like Hey I'm okay and he siad Well I didn't ask if you were okay or not butthole and I said Back off man dood and he said YOU back off and I was all like Get out of here you jerk and he was totally all Hey man... I hate you And I was like Yo whattup why you be hating and I was like chill out man and he was like No. You And I was all This conversation's over. I'm leaving.

Then I left. A hey hey! A hoo hoo! Chookie chookie chookie! I just realized that I put a name up there that is not the person that is supposed to be writing this. Weird. Y'know monsters? Those things are strange. I like that franky one with the bolts and shit? He's cool. He's seck. Like sick dank fool legit rondonkulous. No but seriously I don't say that. I JUST typed "das foonay" but not on here like on somewhere else you knows? Yeah so babe whats up? Y'know ants? Those guys are small. Like what the sun not is. Which is large. Meaning small.

Goodnight and goodluck!

Fond of Parallels

Well well well. We meet again. Butthead! C U Next Tuesday! Those seemed like inappropriate words to shout at this time, but I did anyways. You should all take some time to take this blog for granted, because I'm an essentially invisible person. I mean, have you seen me? I know it's hard to look sometimes, and you may be forced to shield your eyes, but the truth has to be soaked in sometimes. I'm a goddamn sight for sore eyes . It's like someone sculpted me out of melted playdoh. Maybe it was that Ronald McDonald guy. Enough with the Dobby-isms, lets get down to brass tacks. Oh, you didn't bring any? Well that ruins everything! Now there's absolutely no hope. One word I would use to describe myself is... pathetic. Yeah, that's the one. Take a good, hard look at me. Pathetic, no? Once, a gal on the street told me I was like nothing she'd ever seen. Way to go and make a chick feel like dirt chiquita shmashmana! You know what my favorite movie of all time is? Really any holocaust documentary. Wow there are some scenes in that shit that I just can't help but be obsessed with. It makes me want to fly over a rainbow and travel to Hitler's house. And it fills my tummy with nuclear weaponry. Just thinking about it made me feel like lying in a bed of atom bombs. Oh bombas, sweet bikas. How I love thee and thy sweeteth explosions. I wimper as I watch you shatter and destroy. Oh me oh my, how the time lasts forever. I feel like there could have been a valuable rhyme in there somewhere, but who am I kidding, I totally suck. Does the word 'pee' originate from 'piss'? Just curious. Raise your hand if your favorite character from Star Trek is Nero! Mine too! You know who I just absolutely completely loathe?! Oprah. Seriously, give up on the whole "become god" thing and just go back to wherever you came from. Oh and bring Gail with you. My idol, on the other hand, is Marilyn Manson. He exudes such substance and wisdom, I almost can't handle it. Alright y'all, time to go spend some time in a black hole. *Loneliness* See you never. -Lauren

Fond of Secrets

I have a huge secret to let you in on. Are you curious to know what it is, or are you just angry I'm keeping secrets from you in the first place? I'd be both. Don't worry, this even THAT huge of a deal. I mean it's huge but it's not THAT huge. I'd say on the richter scale of huge, it's about a 5. And that's just to me, to you it's probably somewhere between a 3 or a 4. I remember when my sisters were 3 and 4, it seems like only yesterday. I digress. Where was I? Guys, really, where was I? Oh yeah, tengo uno secreto grande. Oh you don't speak Spanish? That's present tense first person Spanish for: "I have a big secret." And there you have it, your foreign languages lesson for the day. I'll see you tomorrow for a brief lecture on the importance of the umlaut. What's that you say? You don't know what an umlaut is? That proposes some über concern and unrest within me. We're going to have to have an extra lesson about punctuation after I'm done telling you all about my secret. Oh, and what a secret it is! I remember this one time, this girl was like "I have a secret!" and I was like "No way!" and she was like "Yeah way!" Can you believe it? I know, me neither. Sometimes secrets like that are just too hard to handle. Sorry if my secret is too wild for your virgin ears. Wait, I forgot to ask the most basic question, can you keep a secret? -Lauren

Fond of Ecstasy

Whoa, Lauren, you like drugs? No, silly, I'm just ecstatic! Tonight my Mock Trial team won the LA County Championship! I'm kind of going insane with hyperness and exhaustion, and basically I'm just incredibly excited. We get to go to Telesca's house for a Christmas party, get our picture/plaque on his Wall of Fame, get out winning year on the banner in St. Louis Hall, get shiny gold medals, be on ABC's Eyewitness News, AND MOVE ON TO STATE! I'm going to be really boring and leave it at that but I am really excited for tomorrow and the rest of the week because I'm going on service which means no homework which means sleep. Yay sleep! Oh, and West Wing, but that's a given. Also if you ever needed a favor from me, now's the time to ask because I'm insanely happy and bound to say yes. You're welcome for leaking that valuable information. Goodnight and good riddance! -Lauren

Fond of Love That You Live For (Singing)

Workin' hard to get my KILL! Everybody wants a decapitation! Oh man, I wish that fucking rhymed. I wish that fucking ROCKED! Rock! That's a nifty genre of the that thing called music. Speaking of that thing music what the hell is "house" music?!? I always hear about the dang nabbit thing but what is it?!? Like music that builds homes? Msic that is only strictly listened to in homes? I don't know. I hate it. Here's a picture...

I like the pinks. They are like swirly little love-hate balls. The greens are like the love that only exists in awesome fairy tales. Like Cindy the rella and shit? The yellows can go eat some lemon cake. That shit is shit. The purples are like the sexually frustrated inhabitants of a planet called Zork where they only wear 3 kinds of hats: Baseball. Ten gallon. Cowboy. My watermelon patch is coming along quite elegantly, do I even have a one of those? I have one of those as much as Sarah Jessica Parker has talent and beauty. Which is none. None at all. The little white spots make me want to commit treason. HIGH treason.

The hills are alive with Pineapple frostys!!!

Fond of Pasta

I just got home, so even though this post is going to say Saturday, it's meant for Friday.

These are the songs that have been stuck in my head today:

The Bad Touch - Bloodhound Gang

The Boys are Back in Town - Whoever it's by, I don't know, everyone just knows this song

To Dance Again - Joe Walker

A Day in the Life - The Beatles

Do with them what you will. Quite an odd selection I must say, especially because I only listened to one of them today. I'm overcome with exhaustion, and I think I've already given you enough to think about, so I'm going to be done now.

Hasta la pasta! -Lauren

Fond of Gobble

So today I gobble gobble the gobble after the gobble gobbled the gobble. Then I took my gobble and gobbled the gobbling gobble to gobble the new gobble.

Food coma and West Wing. End of Story.

Happy Thanksgiving! -Lauren

Fond of Gratitude

Happy Thanksgiving Eve! Today felt like the longest day in the history of days. It started out great though, with a wake up text telling me we won Mock Trial and are advancing to the finals! Then I spent the rest of the day with my cousin who has been away at cousin for 3 months. For some reason, I swear this day lasted more than 24 hours. I am exhausted! Don't y'all worry, I got in my Rob Lowe fix with another SEF viewing. I'm so tired and my arm hurts so I'm just going to leave you with this sad excuse for a blog and hope you forgive me in the spirit of the holiday. I'll even buy you all a drink at Starbucks! Tempting, I know.

As a consolation prize, here's a list of some of the things I'm thankful for:

1. My Family

2. My Bestest of Friends

3. My Mock Trial Team (partially in conjunction with #2)

4. Rob Lowe

5. The Rest of my Husbands

6. All the Broccoli Bake I'm Going to Consume Tomorrow

7. A Bunch of Other Things

I realize that I capitalized those all as if they were book titles, but I feel like it would look weird otherwise, so deal.

Peace, Punch, Cap'n Crunch! -Lauren

Fond of Elvis

Who's in a super crazy hyper mood? I am! Takin' a trip to good 'ol Rantasmia, you could say. Maybe it's just a result of my intense procrastination, but I'm bouncing off the walls! My family has officially locked me in my room as a sort of solitary confinement for the evening because I've gone buck-wild and they can't contain me! (Nor do they want to deal with me, for that matter). I have to tell you the craziest story that happened to me! This morning, on the way to school, a scruffy looking man was hitchhiking on the side of Topanga. He seemed nice enough so I let him in my little toaster. Turns out it was Elvis! Can you believe it?! THE KING! So we drove the rest of the way to Louisville discussing Blue Suede Shoes and singing every song by Elvis you could imagine. We bopped around and laughed until we cried and then when we got to school, he agreed to do a revival show! It was amazing! Elvis had the nuns' toes tap-tap-tappin' and the faculty's hips bump-bump-bumpin' to the beat! What a day. My dad just walked into my room and told me my Physics work is scary. He's right. It gave me nightmares the other day. One, for instance, had me sliding down an inclined plane at 70 degrees on a 35 kg box with an acceleration of 75 meters per second squares, and if I couldn't figure out its net force before I reached the bottom, well, bye bye Lauren! (Fnet=2625N, by the way). So I survived, but it was one of the scariest dreams I've ever had! Now I'm rockin out to Glee! Basically I do that every second of every day, but it gets a little crazier when I'm jumping around my room, "singing," by myself. Lalalalala! I'm going to get back to doing what I was doing. You probably should too. Or, I'll pretend I'm leading by example, and tell you to crank up your music and dance! You ain't nothing but a hound dog! -Lauren

Fond of Pie

Wow, uh, Mr. Chaucer? Go to hell. I mean, you're already dead and gone, but I hope you're in hell anyways. Why would you ever write your Canterbury Tales in Middle English, thus inspiring my English teacher to have us memorize it...IN MIDDLE ENGLISH?! It's pointless, brutal busywork. As if I'm not busy enough already! I have two things on my agenda today: Memorize [stupid] Canterbury Tales Prologue and buy pies. Which do you think I'd rather do? Commit to memory the most tedious 18 lines in an alien language or go purchase my favorite dessert? Hmm, it's a toughy, I know. However, I'm trying to put off the buying of the pies as long as I can so that I can use that excuse to procrastinate later. For the time being, I'm out of procrastination tactics, so I decided to blog earlier than usual. You know what makes me angry? A month or two ago I read that this winter was supposed to be California's worst in 5 years. If that's true, then why is it supposed to be in the 70s on Thanksgiving? Mother Nature must have something against me. Was it that one time I cursed you for making it sunny on Christmas? Can't we all just get along? Yeah? Good. The West Wing has officially proved to be the most efficient means of procrastination. Thought you'd like to know. I not only spent hours watching 3 episodes, but spent extra time reading the extended biography of each individual character on Wikipedia. In my defense, it's my favorite show, but I'm still a little pathetic. Okay, I'm off to finally buy those pies! Catch ya on the flipside turkduckens! -Lauren

Fond of Poetry

So on this lovely Saturday night something very, very exciting is about to happen. I'm about to watch Star Trek! I've missed it so much since it was in theaters, and now I am a proud owner of the 2-Disc Special Edition! Oooh yeeeah! Today was like a whirlwind of little girls. I felt like singing the song from Annie they were so nutso. They even had a dance-off. I kid you not. I also have the mash-up of Don't Stand So Close To Me/Young Girl from Glee this week in my head (and it's been there for HOURS I'm telling you, HOURS). Anyway, I told you yesterday I'd be creative so hows abouts we write us a poem?

Roses are Red

Violets are Blue

I love Rob Lowe

And he loves me too!

Another, you ask? Alright!

Roses are Blue

Violets are Red

Me and my Broldy

Are soon to be wed!

Wow, my immediate future's lookin gooood! I better get on that!

Beam me up, Scotty! -Lauren

Fond of Itineraries

So this week was kind of a whirlwind of blah, and I had to be very serious and focused (Snoozefest!). Wanna see an itinerary? Okay, okay calm down, I'll show ya:

Monday: Mock Trial 3 hour rehearsal and then NHS awards ceremony (which I had to attend of course because I am VP and had to sit in front of everyone).

Tuesday: Mock Trial competition at the LA county courthouse. Not too bad because I wasn't on but I did have to be clerk which I actually find more stressful than my actual role. Guess what? We won this competition and became 1 of 8 teams left in the countywide competition.

Wednesday: Yet another long Mock trial rehearsal (See any patterns?). Got home at a reasonable hour but then spent about 4 or 5 making a massive Chaucer study guide.

Thursday: Mock Trial competition #2 of the week. This time, I'm in it. The competition started out with 70 teams and after this round only 4 are left...and we're one of them! Semi-finals are next Tuesday and I'm up again!

Friday: Mock Trial practice and then FINALLY some relaxation (West Wing) time. Just me and Rob and the livins good!

[End itinerary]

Part of me wishes I had big plans for the weekend, but I'm also just glad to be able to slow down. I want to just eat sugar and coffee and lie around for 48 hours. Wouldn't that be grrreat?! Next week is Thanksgiving (THANK THE LAWD!), which is a much needed break. I have about a bajillion things to do over this "break," but hey, it's something. I won't be happy until it's officially Christmastime though. My excitement is immeasurable. The one regret about the Christmas season is that it goes by too quickly and New Years is never good. But who's here to complain? Not me, that's for sure! This is less uh...transparent...than my posts for the rest of this past week, but garbage nonetheless. I promise to get the creative juices flowing tomorrow when I'm well rested!

Sayonara dumplings! -Lauren

Fond of Cathy

I'm baaaaaaack! This is going to be brief, because I'm more or less busier than the president (I kid, love you Obama!). But really, I have Mock Trial every day, NHS Ceremony was tonight, Canterbury Tales test, East of Eden essay, memorizing the first 18 lines of the Canterbury Tales prologue...in middle English, college apps due in less than two weeks, and the millions of things in between. Yeah, I know what you're thinking: When am she gonna find time to sleep? I honestly can't answer that question. What I will tell you is that Cathy Trask is a crazy biotch. If you haven't met her, read East of Eden. It's like 600 pages, but so worth it. Or I can just give you my essay about how she's a psychopath when I'm done. Either way, you'll get the picture. So, I don't really have any more to say other than thanks for being so understanding about my lack of blogs this past weekend and low level of substance or creativity throughout the week. I'll be back on my feet in no time. Hasta luego! -Lauren

Fond of M-W Kosher

Yesterday's blog has left my well of creativity dry. Maybe it's also because I haven't gotten more than 5 hours of sleep in three nights and have had extremely long days. My eyes can only stay a fraction of the way open too. I feel awesome! (Sarcasm emanating...) Of course I have to get up tomorrow at the grand 'ol buttcrack of dawn to do my least favorite thing...flying. It's kind of the paradox of my life because I would LOVE to have the power to fly, but stick me on an airplane and you'll want to strike up a lobotomy revival in no time just to shut me up. I guess people tend to feel that way on the ground anyways though so things shouldn't seem much different. I thought I had much more energy in me to write but the well is running dry once again. I guess I should warn you in advance that the chances of a blog for Saturday or Sunday are zero to none since I'm going to be busy busy busy, and when I'm not occupied I'll be slaving away at my multitudes of homework. Thanks, by the way, teachers, for giving me the most homework ever on a weekend when I knew it advance I'd be gone. You all deserve an award of sorts. My eyes are drooping past the point of no return so for the sake of the caliber of my spelling and grammar, I'm gonna get out while I'm still Merriam-Webster kosher. Hava Nagila (sp?) Homeslices! -Lauren

Fond (?) of Nigel Tomm

Today, Oli and I co-discovered the insanity that is Nigel Tomm. It all started when Oli IMdB'd The Catcher in the Rye to see if there was a movie and was given the option to watch the entire film directed by Nigel Tomm. Of course, he clicked it, only to find that it was 75 minutes of a blank blue screen. Astonished and confused, I decided to Wikipedia this curious character. After finding no such Wikipedia page, I kept researching only to find that Nigel Tomm is an eccentric author, artist, and to say the least, absurdist. He writes a terribly narcissistic blog, each post claiming he is the Most _____ of 2009-2010 and having a differently colored version of the same flattering photograph of himself. Under this photograph is a different line about how inspirational and innovative his hair is. Weird, right? It gets much, much worse. Next, Oli discovers that our pal Nige has a Youtube account and did a series of vlogs all titled "I'm Nigel Tomm," containing a silent, black and white Nigel moving in swift, staccato movements that are nothing short of eerily creepy. These vlogs literally made me scream. Although it may seem like I can't stand this guy, I can't seem to stop wondering about him. If you can even call Nigel a him. Oli and then started following NigelTomm on Twitter and I found myself in a Nigel tweeting frenzy! As I said in a tweet, Nigel makes me say things that don't say things. And then those things say other things. Nigel seems to turn all of these things into, for the most part [homo]sexually perverse notions. What a gem. Within the last hour, we have ventured to our good pal Amazon to search for some of Nigel's work. With phallic, blah, abstract representations of modern Pop culture, Nigel has officially raised the bar of madness for lunatics everywhere. So that you can come the slightest bit closer to understanding the anomely that is Nigel Tomm, take a gander at one of his book titles: Kidult Eva Mendes In Fucky Kidulthood Poster With Anne Hathaway & Denise Richards Beg Rachel Mcadams: Let Naomi Watts, Matthew Mcconaughey, Tara Reid & Monica Bellucci Calendar Sex Movies Biography (Paperback). The text of Nigel's books are either none at all, or laced with "blahs" and "fucks." For example, a paragraph may read something along the lines of: "Then she blah blah the fucking blah and blah the blah fuck her the blah and brought the blah to the blah blah fuckety blah with Anne Hathaway blah." Don't worry, I'm speechless too. So, now I remain, pondering whether or not to think Nigel is freaky and brilliant or just completely deranged, and strongly considering purchasing some of his work. Nigel Tomm said himself: "Animals have several characteristics that set them apart from Nigel Tomm." -Lauren

Fond of Today

Greetings Earthlings! Today was kind of a big deal. Here's why:

1. I had no school. Thus, I got to be lazy. When is that NOT awesome!?

2. It was my sister, Ashton's, 8th birthday. Naturally, we had a Bunny party! She also got an iPod touch which made her cry which was the cutest thing ever.

3. It was the fearless leader of my Mock Trial team, Mr. Telesca's birthday. I didn't hang out with him. That would be weird.

4. There's a new Glee that I need to start watching very very soon! Oh Glee, how I've missed you.

...And last, but not least, 5. WE WON ROUNDS 1&2 OF MOCK TRIAL! YAY! This means we go on to be 1 of 16 teams left in the competition! I am so proud of all the hard work we have done to get where we are.

Just a funny anecdote from the day: Today, at dinner, my sister Cameron said and I quote: "I've got a secret that I just need to get out! I want to be goth!" She's 8, going on 9. Enough said. I laughed for 900 hours.

Peace out home skillets! -Lauren

Fond of Blah

Just got home from mock trial. Have a migraine. Will make up for this tomorrow, don't fret.

Live long and prosper, Lauren.

Fond of Vowels

I was going to try to write something I like for each letter of the alphabet, but realized how tedious this would be, so I decided to do vowels only. Since there are less, I'll even give you a little explanation, what a treat!

A- After Thanksgiving, it is Christmastime! (And boy do I love spreading Christmas cheer!)

E- Everything having to do with Rob Lowe. (Why do I turn every blog post into a Rob Lowe fest?)

I- Intellectually stimulated people. (If you aren't one, go away.)

O- Opposing conservativism. (I'm a pro-choice, No on Prop 8, Probably on Marxism feminist.)

U- Underappreciated music. (Like Cage the Elephant, Vampire Weekend, and The Virgins.)

Short but sweet. Voila! -Lauren

Fond of Sunday Afternoons

I feel like I'm procrastinating, but it's weird because I'm not. I have no work to do. That nothing to do feeling is kind of the biggest joy about Sunday afternoons. They're so damn relaxing. Do you ever feel like the same 10 or so songs come on shuffle? That always seems to happen to me. And they always happen to be songs I skip every time. One of my dreams is to have a cake made for me by the Ace of Cakes crew. And I'd like the people who specifically do my cake to be Katherine, Ben, and Geoff. Duff obviously would help out too. The trouble with that is the cakes cost a fortune and need to be planned like a decade in advance. But how cool would that be? My wedding cake for sure has to be a Charm City Cakes original. Or else it's off (future husband, please keep this in mind). The aesthetics and flavor of the cake can be discussed at a later date. I feel like blogging always makes me realize how hungry I am, and yet again, I'm starving! I wonder what's for dinner. Perhaps it's my favorite, roast antelope stew! A delectable treat, I must say. And then, my mom will make fried frog legs on the side and chocolate covered beaks for dessert. TASTY! Was it weird that I just admitted that? I don't care... On another note, I'm really excited for Round 2 of Mock Trial on Tuesday! I get out of school early AND don't even have to perform. However, I do have to be the clerk and keep time which is extremely stressful. Hopefully all the times magically add and subtract evenly so I don't have to worry. This weekend was kind of annoying. One thing led to another and I spent approximately 24 consecutive hours home alone. Bo-ring! Also, it makes me go a little insane in the membrane not talking to anyone. Last night's Lauren/Rob quality time wasn't bad though.

Stay gold, Ponyboys! -Lauren

Fond of Johnny Rockets

I really want one of those gigantic lollipops from Disneyland. You know, the swirly colorful ones that taste like rainbows?? Come to think of it, I haven't eaten in a while. I should have some dinner. I'm home alone so I'm really bored of course. I just watched The Outsiders, obvi I have to spend some portion of every weekend with my husband (Rob Lowe, in case you're an ignorant fool), so this was this weekend's dose. This Daylight Savings Time thing is really messing with me, because it's only 8:30ish and it's pitch black out. I thought it was at least 11. It makes me tired earlier too, which sucks. I need double my usual amount of coffee just to stay awake every day. There's a Magic 8 Ball sitting on my desk, and I'm thoroughly confused as to why. What business do I have with one of those? Besides decision-making, of course. "Magic 8 Ball, does Rob Lowe love me?" "Signs point to yes." EUREKA! I should really refer to this thing more, it's startlingly accurate. I'm dying for a Boca burger and fries from Johnny Rockets, but there is a 0% chance of me having that for dinner. Bummer...(That was a hint to go get me one, if you couldn't tell). Whoa, eerie, the Pirates of the Caribbean towel that hangs on my closet just slid down. Is this a message from Johnny Depp that he's jealous about Rob and I? I'm thinking I'll sleep with one eye open tonight. I'm not too worried though, Robby will keep me safe and warm. Maybe he'll fetch me a Johnny Rockets burger. He's such a doll. Rob, not Johnny Rocket. I need to go tend to Johhny's broken heart, catch ya on the flip side! -Lauren.

Fond of Questionnaires

Let's start by writing one sentence with each word beginning with the next letter alphabetically for as long as I can:

Always bring chocolate down extra fast given he is just kidding like my neighbor ordered promptly, quietly, right so that umbrellas vanish with xylophones you zapped. A-Z! A round of applause please...

Moving on, I thought I'd do one of those funky fresh myspace style surveys as a "get to know me" effort. So I googled these about me surveys and found one that I decided to use and I put it in this post and typed out all the answers into the little boxes and I had to keep holding down the space bar or it jumped back up to the top and it was so irritating and then when I finally finished and submitted the blog, none of my answers showed. UGH! Just for you, I'll give it another go:

You wanna know about me? Ask me.

The end. -Lauren

Fond of 'Mallows

You know what I find borderline hilarious? My emo phase. When I was in the midst of my cool girl days, I had a streak of love-sick depression in which I got really obsessed with emo music. My top two favorite artists were definitely Ashlee Simpson and My Chemical Romance. Ashlee was my IDOL. I remember how badly I wanted to dye my hair black and I tried to dress like her all the time and I'd just walk around listening to MCR on my iPod, thinking I was so incredibly cool. I hope you know this is making me crack up right now. I am such the polar opposite of my middle school self it's astonishing. My dream of having dark hair finally did come true though, hehe. I really really want to watch Kiki's Delivery Service right now. If you don't know what that is, you have my full permission to punish yourself Dobby style. It's the greatest, cutest Miyazaki movie EVER! And I L-O-V-E his movies, so that's saying a lot. I also really badly want s'mores right now. Mmm s'mores. Mostly for the burnt-to-the-crisp marshmallows. They're my FAVE! De-freakin-licious, that's what they are. Once in Chemistry I toasted marshmallows on the Bunsen burner. That was an enjoyable experience. I think it goes without saying that I was awful at labs and became notorious for breaking things. Silly me. The 'mallows were worth it. I'm looking up at my hamburger phone Juno magnet and wishing I had a hamburger phone. I wonder if I'd use it...I haven't had a land line in my room for years. I remember the first phone I got put in my room, it was for Christmas and I unwrapped and re wrapped the present under the tree. It was pretty much the shit. Then I got this Nickelodeon phone from I don't remember where but it was the shittiest shit on the planet! It had cool Nick themed ring tones and it was colorful and... damn did I love that thing. I'm pretty sure after that I just had my cell phone and that's it. For the longest time I didn't even have a clock in my room besides my phone because I couldn't sleep with the awkward, incessant buzzing it made (I was quite the insomniac, you see). Now I've got an iHome to fill the role of clock but still no replaced land line. I would get a hamburguesa phone but it totally conflicts with the theme of my room. Maybe there's some colorful, mod phone out there I can rustle up. I'll have to look into it more carefully.

Alright, I'm off to scrub a dub dub, Lauren.

Fond of Mother Nature

Hmm, what to blog about? Today was a rather boring day. Actually, come to think of it I feel like today has exceeded 24 hours. Maybe because of late start, I don't know. I accomplished next to nothing. If you asked me how today was, I'd say "Eh." Bleh blah bluh bloh. I wish it snowed in Southern California. It's November 4th and it had to have been at least 80 degrees today. What is up with that? Sweats season has officially begun but I think someone forgot to notify the weather. I guess I'll have to do it myself. Hey, uh, Mr. Weather? Or is it Mother Nature? Whoever you are, it's November and time to get chilly. A little gloom wouldn't do any harm. You never know, maybe even a little rain. I want wearing scarves, coats, and boots while drinking hot beverages to be a necessity. I beg of you, at least make it colder before Christmastime. Or else I will freak out, to say the least. I'm getting desperate here. Can we make a bargain and just move the temperature during the day down to the 60s? Warm weather increases stress, and I'm already in enough high-stress environments. PLEASE! I am literally groveling. You can see how much I like you from the title of this blog, so come on and return the favor. I guess I can turn to bribes but I don't think of you as that cheap. I sure hope I'll be able to sing "The sun won't come out, tomorrow!" tomorrow. That will bring me buckets of joy!

I've got to go cross my fingers for a rainy day now, so until next time, Lauren.

Fond of Progress

I'm in SOOCH a weird mood. I am weeeeird (KIbK reference)! I've been in my room applying to college for the last 3 hours and I feel like I literally haven't uttered a word to anyone. Maybe I should test my voice to make sure I still have one....MEEP! I said it out loud too. It barely worked. What's happening to me?!?! I just got this new app on my phone so that I can type all these ah-dorable little creatures and emoticons and I'm going wild using them. I just realized that I'm STARVING. I mean, not actually in a life or death sense, but I haven't eaten since lunch at approximately 11:15. Also my hands are cramping up like crazy from all the college app typing and clicking and whatnot. I don't know how much longer I can go on. But I will, for your sake. I think when I'm done with this I'll go eat and watch West Wing or something awesome like that. Wanna hear the good news? There's actually two things. One, I have late start tomorrow! Hip hip, hooray! For you imbeciles out there, this means I don't have to go to school until 9am which is a huge improvement from the usual 7:45am. Two, I decided today to apply to the University of Michigan (at Ann Arbor), and I am ecstatic! I learned about the school obvz from my AVPM buddies, but I researched it today and it is super-duper-ally-ooper-amazing! I made a huge amount of progress on my applications after I filled out the UMich app. I just have a few essays to write and revise, and I'm done! Can you believe it? Little 'ol me, applying to the big C-O-L-L-E-G-E?! I can't either. It is trés exciting though. And scary. And crazy. And everything new and insane. Oh my am I going wild right now! I can barely even put it into words. If I'm sitting for one more minute I honestly will spontaneously combust, so I think you'd agree that I should probably go. Yay for progress putting me in a good mood!

Adios amigos! -Lauren.

Fond of Persimmons

Before I get into what I really want to talk about, I'd like to take a moment to ponder the word "persimmon." It honestly just popped into my head and voila, I had a useful random subject to discuss. Persimmon itself is an actual fruit, but this is not the specimen with which I am concerned. The word persimmon is simply delightful and pleasant to say in its own. Try it, I guarantee it'll make you feel happier, or your money back (not that you're paying anything). It makes me feel that way though, and it's pretty much how I'm feeling right now. Thus, I am going to dub persimmon my own word. I'm pleasantly persimmon.

On to a more serious subject. Tonight I had my first mock trial competition! (Hold for applause) And . . . we DOMINATED! It felt so good, let me tell you. It was kind of like a persimmon if you think about it. I guess not really though. It was so intense being there in the court room, but at the same time was much more relaxing than expected. I am so proud of our Defense Team and ecstatic that we are going to advance to the next round! I mean, how impressive is it that we were SO good the judge couldn't even let a pity verdict slide? We won that too! Danielle, Grace, the Fasaners, Doc, Mo, Ace (me), and JotheJoker herself kicked some serious ass tonight. Congratulations to us! I feel like we should have some very merry un-birthday type celebration. The In n Out more or less sufficed, I suppose, but I still just want to jump for joy!

I'm off to eat some persimmons, Lauren.

Fond of Cats

It's kind of freaking me out that it's only 9:12pm. Isn't it supposed to be 10:12? Yeah. But daylight savings time made the hours fall back. So I got an extra hour of sleep this morning how fantastic is that?! I'm making it sound like it was just for me, but you got it too, yay for you! Today, my main man O-Money showed me the greatest video on Earth, "Cats Inspired by Cats." It made me laugh up a furball. No kidding. I wish I could show you guys all the video. Oh wait, I can! (http://www.youtube.com/results?search_query=cats+inspired+by+cats&search_type=&aq=0&oq=cats+inspired+b) That formatted kind of strangely, but there you have it babushkas! You should also go on to watch it's inspiration "Kittens Inspired by Kittens." You'll get a bunch more furballs. Then, you should make like shampoo after you've lathered and rinsed and repeat! Watch those golden lil videos over and over again until the laughing has given you a migraine. I'm telling you, it's worth your while. Yo necesito estudiar por un examen de español. Or maybe I'm better off than I thought! I kid, I really really do need to study. However, I think I'll watch CIbC, the new meaning to my life, instead.

It may be controversial, but I love him! -Lauren

Fond of Halloween

This is an advanced apology for this blog post. I am too tired and feel too sick to even know what I'm writing. I just sneezed approximately 8 times in 2 minutes. Goodnight and I'll see you at tomorrow's blog post that will surely make up for this.

Happy Halloween! -Lauren

Fond of Premarital Sax

Hello all! Just taking a break from my Rob Lowe-athon. That includes countless episodes of The West Wing, St. Elmo's Fire, and if I were so lucky as to own it, The Outsiders. I love that man with my whole heart. Today since it is Halloween Eve, we dressed up for school and naturally, I was a hobo. I found it all too easy to come up with this costume out of my own clothes. Whether this is a good or bad thing I do not know, but I'm pretty sure it's got a negative connotation. The quasi-dred locks in my hair aren't feeling too great right about now though. Note to self: Hobo as a further profession might not be such a great idea if I want to avoid daily headaches. Also, I've been devouring the book The Wild Things. I got it yesterday and I'm more than halfway through (which actually is slow if I were massacring (sp?) the book, but for devouring I'm right on track). Tomorrow is Halloween. (Way to state the obvious, imbecile.) Halloween used to be my favorite holiday. I loved coming up with a clever and accurate costume and doing whatever ghoulish mischief I happened to get into. But Halloween just isn't that fun any more. No one really does anything worthwhile, and this year in particular I am worried about my first Mock Trial competition this Monday. Guess I'm on the hunt for a new favorite holiday. Any takers? I'd say Christmas and Thanksgiving are definitely in the running, mostly because they're the only two holidays I get to enjoy my Aunt's broccoli bake (I know it sounds unappetizing, but it's addicting). New years always has potential too but never really meets even my lowest expectations. I guess I'll have to settle and say my favorite holiday is Arbor Day. Good 'ol trees, never hurt anyone. They set out for one purpose and for one purpose only: to serve mankind. And what do we give them back? Destruction. Come on people, lets show the trees some respect and celebrate Arbor Day like it's 1999 (Did they even care in 1999? That just fit with the sentence). What I'm trying to say is...well...I have no idea. I think I'll go read now. Or maybe have a seance. Whatever floats my boat in ten minutes.

Off to hang out with Billy the Kid! -Lauren

Fond of No Direction

Due to a lack of creativity, I have decided to make today's post a compilation of Blogger's random questions, and my answers to them:

Why does the taste of pennies remind you of losing a tooth?

I think it's got something to do with the copper. Call me crazy but isn't there copper in blood? Something weird like that.

Why does the color blue mean raspberry-flavored?

I honestly don't think anybody knows. Perhaps it is a mutation. All I know is it's my favorite flavor!

You've been invited to a fancy ball but the only thing you have to wear is an orange wooly jumper. What shoes do you wear?

High tops. If I'm going to stand out, my shoes need to be cool and comfortable, obviously.

Chicken monkey shoes?

Are the only ones in my closet.

You've just inherited a manufacturing plant that specializes in plastics. What are you going to make?

Kazoos. I don't think this needs any more of an explanation.

Your hand has been replaced by a rubber stamp. What does it say?

If found, please return to: Rob Lowe.

I apologize, the unfunniness of this is astounding. But thank you, and goodnight! -Lauren

Fond of The Great Avocado Challenge

I just encountered a very exciting moment, and in that moment, I completed the World's Longest Book, East of Eden. It was a beautifully profound and inspiring book, with approximately 700 main characters and an equal amount of developed story lines. Kudos, John Steinbeck. I'm bummed that there's no new Glee tonight. I feel empty without my weekly dose of Finn, Puck, and Sue Sylvester. It's kind of like my mid-week stress remedy. Now I'm just sick and Glee-less but not too bad. My mom FINALLY picked The Wild Things up from Village Books today and I can't wait to start reading it! Especially after my religion teacher, Mr. Crehan's inspiring speech about how we will one day become Queen/King of the Wild Things in our own respect. I sure hope he's right, because he really gave me something to grasp and look forward to. My eye just caught a picture my friend Pilar drew of an avocado necklace, so I think I'll explain the story. One weekend over summer she was going to an avocado orchard with a friend, and since they're my favorite thing in the world, I asked her to get me a souvenir. Obviously, my first instinct was to ask for actual avocados, because what's better than the original? However, they were out of season, so assuming an avocado orchard equates to the commercial status of Disneyland, I asked her to buy me an avocado necklace. Unfortunately, as far as this orchard went, there was no such thing. I do actually have a Jason Mraz avocado pin on my school blazer though, which is almost as cool. I can't get over the fact that I'm still avocado necklace-less, even if Pilar did draw me an uncanny representation of what it should look like. She also drew me a shark, Totoro, jellyfish, and us holding hands on the same paper and it's kind of the best artwork I've ever received. You can top her though if you produce a real life avocado necklace. That's an official challenge. I shall call it "The Great Avocado Challenge."

On your marks, get set, AVOCADO! -Lauren

Fond of Windy Evenings

Maybe not where you live, but where I live, it is so windy outside, eek! The wind made my kitchen lights flicker to the max and all us girls over here started screaming like a babbling bumbling band of baboons! We currently have no man to protect us, but don't worry, I'm kind of the tough one. It's kind of a big bowl of suck though because I'm sick and I'm all nasally and coughy and gross and I can barely even hear my self talk. It's lovely, really. The pillow my head's a'restin on looks like a can of Crush, and that sounds positively delightful right now. I really can't wait for Meaty. Don't ask, you wouldn't understand. Its just something between Oli, Broldy, Driss, FunkWalk, Jaimes, Nicky, Joey, etc. and I. You know what my favorite kind of flower is? That's a trick question, because it's a three way tie between Daisy, Tulip, and Sunflower. If any of you in the audience go by the name of Masey, Rob Lowe, Kev Kev, Silas, FunkyWalky, Broldy, Puck, Finn - this message is for you. Not to be a pedophile, but I also wanna give a shout out to the corkiest kid in town Max from WtWTA!! Earlier, I told Oli to write about berries and he said he was writing about strawberries and so I thought I'd tell you that I'm technically allergic to strawberries. Aren't I one huge freak of nature?! I know, I know. I really have nothing more to say at all and my head is aching like someone pounded it with a tub of Hershey's kisses. Toodalloo! -Lauren

Fond of Everything on a Waffle

Today, I have no homework. I know, I'm as shocked as you are. I'm feeling slightly under the weather, but mostly just in that mode where you're really tired but have all this weird energy sprouting from nowhere. It's like a llama on a spring morning after a plate of blueberry waffles. I actually just made that up to emphasize my point, but I like the way it sounds. Mmm I kind of want some waffles from Der Waffle Haus now, even though I just had sopa for dinner. My throat itches so badly I wish I could just have a stream of warm hot chocolate living in my throat to make it all better. Also I wish it was raining. Rain, rain, don't go away, come again this very day! That would all be just so great, dontcha agree? I just looked up and gave my buddies John, Paul, Georgie, and Ringo a lil wink. They're stand up lads I must say. Never met four fellas so talented in my life. My wallpaper on my computer and phone are the corkies Where the Wild Things Are pictures in the universe. Lil Maxipad and K Dubz; Aww doesn't it just make you want to cuddle with someone right on the spot? I think I shall go cuddle up and have me some loco hot cocoa and maybe even a waffle if I'm feeling so deranged. Mister Masey friend, I hopeth thou cometh over tonight!

Peace out mamacitas! -Lauren

Fond of Zetea

Zetea*. Population Nnno. Founded by the great Z herself in the year Nineteen Sixty Nnno. Zeteans can be found all around America, but it is guaranteed that you don't know them. Some notable Zetean-Americans include: Angel from Rent, Mimi from Rent, the '80s mayor in Back to the Future, Roxy from Dead Like Me, Kiffany from Dead Like Me, Theresa from The OC, Carl from Love Actually, the Candy Store Owner from Tim Burton's Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, Mercedes from Glee, Matron Mama Morton from Chiccy, the Asian comedian from that one episode of Dr. Phil, Mr. Eko from Lost, Jacquese (he's ghetto), Calypso from Pirates of the Caribbean, Kingsley Shacklebolt from Harry Potter, Whoopi Goldberg from everything, and many more. Let me break down the happenin's of Zetea for you a bit.

As you can probably tell by the people included in the Zetean-Americans list, to be Zetean you must have an astronomical amount of falava, and exude the Zetean catch phrase: "Y'all don't know me!" All indigenous Zeteans do. If you don't prove to the High Council of Zetea that you not only have falava, but that they don't know you, you will automatically be deported. The High Council of Zetea is comprised of...uh...no one's ever bothered to count because they're too busy being unknown, but numerous floating Giraffe Heads. The Zeteanship process works like so: You must stand before the council and prove that they don't know you, and trust me, this is no easy task. However, you may surpass this test if you are able to wink and snap your fingers in Z formation at the same time. You will then either get a wink of approval or nod of disapproval to tell you the results.

Zetea is equipped with an air-born vigilante police force of Zetean men called the Black Hawks (if you understand the word choice, you are just genius enough to be Zetean). They fly around and protect the Zetean people and Giraffe heads from dogs that may have gone rabid, and various Zetean crimes. The Black Hawks keep the people of Zetea feeling safe and satisfied [;)]. I hope that made sense.

The daily life of a Zetean includes walking around aimlessly but with an enormous amount of swagga. Several times a day Zeteans stop to talk about how little they know each other, and giggle about the floating Giraffe Heads dispersed around the country. They also love pointing out foreigners and watching their befuddled faces stare at the Giraffe Heads and just act so un-Zeteanly known. Zeteans drive around in their hover-cars chanting the Zetean national anthem and bopping their heads in the dance of the High Council.

Another fun fact about Zetea is that there are NO bugs. Instead, Zetea is populated by little dogs. Such dogs include Pekingese, Corgis, and Dachshunds. They scuttle around Zetea, not owned or known by anyone, and contribute to the cycle of life in Zetea.

Although I myself am not Zetean, you can be sure that y'all don't know me! Zetean Powerrrr! (pro.) -Lauren

*(Zetea was co-created by Lauren Lois Evans and Oliver Chase Young-Apstein, and nnno, it is not copyrighted, but nnno, we will not hesitate to kick your ass if you try to steal our ideas.)

Fond of Sleep

I guess it's pretty easy for you to see by the name of this post that I'm both A) Very tired, and maybe not so obvious B) Very delirious. Tonight I went to a Father Daughter dance without my dad, which is odd in the first place, but I also got all dressed up as a fortune teller for it (which was heaps of fun). I feel so mystic now. But even mystics get sleepy, right? Who wants chocolate milk? I do! It's so deliciously refreshing. Mmm I need to stop thinking about it because I don't think I have to chocolate syrup, or energy, to make it. Also I'm bummed because I'm starting to feel sick. I have a hunch it's due to the high stress and low sleep levels of this week. So, to channel my psychic skills, let's ask the Magic 8 Ball: "Should Lauren go to bed right this instant and sleep in until whenever she wants?" . . . "It is certain." There you have it folks, I'm off. I can't tell you how lovely my nine particular pillows look over there on my bed. And no, you cannot come with me, the bed is MINE! Okay, enough hostility; Peace, Punch, Cap'n Crunch nuggets!

Catchin' some Zzz's (This is a secret clue to tomorrow's blog if I remember even writing any of this), Lauren.

Fond of Masey

Not that anyone really knows who I'm talking about, but what do I care, huh? Well, I guess I should inform you that he is British, Beautiful, Brilliant, and Bad...ALL IN ONE! I know, I toohad to sit down when I typed this I was so overwhelmed. Seriously folks, he's the best. You know what else is the best? SEF (or St. Elmo's Fire for you losers out there who don't ab things). Is it a great movie or what? If you said "or what," you need to leave. Now. Go find a cliff, and jump off it. SEF is probably the greatest movie of all time. Jesus said so himself, and he's the son of G-O-D ya know! That is a gigantamum deal. I had to memorize this phrase and it's taken over my brain all day long: "Do you solemnly affirm that the testimony you are about to give faithfully and truthfully conforms to the facts and rules of the Mock Trial Competition" and the whole time I wish I could just say "Do you solemnly swear you are up to no good?" You know what I really dislike? Donuts. They make me feel gross. Today, someone offered me a coconut donut (without knowing it was my ULTIMATE Catch 22), and I literally nibbled off the coconutty parts, because donuts are barf-tastic. I don't like brownies either, unless it's the corner. I'm very particular about my delicacies, you see? Cookies are another story. I ADORE galletas! Chocolate Chip, Sugar, Snickerdoodle, or my favorite, Oatmeal Raisin. The only kind of cookie I loathe is Peanut Butter. Blech. How did I get on this weird tangent about desserts? I guess I'll stick with it. Do you know what my absolute favorite dessert is? You guessed it! Pie. I can't even describe pie in words. Heaven, and delectable are a couple I'd start off with though if I tried. With pie, my favorite is Banana Creme (Pecan in close second) and I literally am incapable of eating Pumpkin Pie. It's the most goddamn nasty thing on the face of the Earth, besides its cousins, flan and rice pudding. Okay, I have to wake up at the butt-crack of dawn to go paint murals at an underprivileged elementary school, doesn't that sound like oodles of fun? (No, I'm not being sarcastic, I mean it). Also, my car is getting detailed tomorrow while I'm gone and I'm super duper mega excited for it to be squeaky clean! See all y'all elf hammers tomorrow!

Hasta la vista baby! -Lauren

Fond of Mental Health

Sorry for missing yesterday, and being an all around crap blogger, but you see there was the issue of my mental health. This week, as implied in my last blog post (which only describes a fraction of the weight of stress), has been EXTREMELY busy. But now spirit week comes to a close, my Gov test has been survived, and all that's left is for me to dress like Palin for "P" day. While yesterday I may have broke down into so many pieces that I couldn't go to class, today I feel the weight slowly lifting off my shoulders (slowly). I even got to go to the Fall Sports Barbecue and Volleyball game tonight and have a ton of fun, support my friends, and most importantly NOT think about school or my responsibilities. Damn, that felt good. Even though I kinda sorta still have a significant amount of homework to do, I currently have a certain peace of mind that I've lacked lately. Getting past this week has given me an extraordinary sense of accomplishment, but it also taught me my limit. Therefore, I hereby declare that I, Lauren Evans, will from hereon out:

-Commit to being myself

-Promise to stop worrying about other people before myself

-Unlock the dusty cabinet that holds the wit I used to have

-Have a sense of humor

-Read for fun like I used to

-Watch exponentially more movies

-Travel to Rantasmia far more often

-Stop breathing a little and calling it a life

TAKE THAT STRESS! -Lauren

Fond of Spirit

That's right folks, it's spirit week at Louisville High School! Today was the first of the theme days, dubbed "Dress Like a Teacher Day." Naturally, the Mock Trial Team and I took it upon ourselves to dress like our fearless leader, Mr. Telesca. We all donned some sort of menswear, from the more casual long-sleeved polo and white sneakers look to the more reserved button down with slacks ensemble. He said it himself that he'd "never been more attracted to us."

Tomorrow is Class Color, and subsequently Pep Rally day. This means that I have to put in a lot of work (and I mean A LOT) to make things great. This morning I got to school at 7am with my fellow class council members to rehearse our dance to the late King of Pop's "Beat It" which we will be bombarding the underclassmen with at tomorrow's rally. Then, after school, I traveled to the dare I say ghetto to Party City to purchase Blue accessories for the Seniors to wear tomorrow. Did I mention I am getting to school at 6am tomorrow to set up all these shenanigans? As early as that it, it is so worth all the fun it's going to be. I can't wait to dress up in my blue tights, scarf, gloves, headband, and cookie monster shirt in support of the Senior Class of 2010! I'll fill you in on the rest of spirit week as it comes along.

Ruah! -Lauren

Fond of Movies

Yes people, this is a reformation. Not that I hated movies before, I had just never really been exposed to them. Quite the foil to my dear old friend, Oliver, who is a movie afficionado to say the least. He has also taken it upon himself to become my official film educator. I can honestly say that a weekend never goes by without my watching at least two movies with him, or suggested by him. Not to mention most of them have quickly gone from titles I'd never heard before to favorites. Since we've become friends it's been this way - I'm the reader and he's the watcher, and it's loads of fun rubbing off on each other. I have now begun the expansion of not only my list of movies watched, but of movies known and owned. My formerly exclusive DVD collection is steadily growing (and will hopefully become very large come Christmastime). I'd have to say my most recent movie obsessions have been Chicago, Love Actually, and St. Elmo's Fire. Chicago immediately went on my already too long Christmas list and the other two were so irresistibly fantastic that they have already been ordered via Amazon and are expected in the near future (and trust me, I can't wait!). Hopefully I'll be able to hold myself to a fraction of the movie knowledge of my Movie Mr. Miyagi and continue my film revolution until I have successfully mastered the art of being a true movie connoisseur.

Lights, Camera, Action! -Lauren

Fond of Illustrious Hacking

Hello. This is not Lauren. It is her nefarious and noble friend, Oliver Chase Young-Apstein. So what do you guys think about Giraffes? I personally love them! I wonder if Lauren likes them? I wonder if one of these days her blog title will be "Fond of Giraffes"? So anyway, where the hell was I? Oh yeah, hacking. Isn't this fun? I personally love it. I hope you fools are loving it because I sure am! So did ya'll hear about Balloon boy? That was crazy, huh? Anyone ever think about Phoenixes? Like the mythical creatures? I do. I love those fiery little bastards! So, what's another topic I can discuss? Let's see...... Which do you prefer, Lions or Tigers? I love both but I think if I was absolutely forced to pick just one of those cuddly little shnukems I would choose the almighty Lion. I mean they have that awesome mane and shiz! Who the frick wouldn't choose them? Okay I think it's enough with the jungle animals. LET THE WILD RUMPUS START! Do you awesome fellas know what that's from? It's from Where the Wild Things Are! I LOVED that movie so much, it was so funny and touching and profound and heartwarming. Can't wait to get it on DVD and watch it over and over again.

Okay well I think it's time for me to go....

Here's a link to my locotastic blog!

http://itsadestinything.blogspot.com/

Oli out.

Fond of Car Rides

Most people find it tedious driving around all the time, but I personally find it quite therapeutic. I never mind driving relatively long distances, whether it's to Woodland Hills, Malibu, or Sherman Oaks. I look at these car rides as an opportunity to rock out, belt out my favorite songs, recognize the nature that surrounds me, and pause for reflection. In such a crowded, busy world, I rarely find time to be completely alone. Car rides fill this void. I don't think anybody in the entire world has ever seen me sing (if you can even call it that) the way I do when I'm driving alone in my car. I have always thought my being featured on one of those "hidden dashboard camera" shows would be hilariously amusing. Lately my choices of songs have included the Glee and Chicago soundtracks. Although I am obviously incapable of hitting or even coming close to any note in any of these songs, I have a blast pretending that I sound as good as Lea Michele or Catherine Zeta-Jones. Apart from driving, I also really love my car. He's a black Toyota Scion xB named Newt. There's a little gecko dangling from the rearview mirror and a unicorn who lives in the cupholder. On Newt's back are currently two stickers: A peace sign and a cute whale that says "Live Simply." On his side is a small sticker given to me by my funcle from Santa Barbara Surf Shop. Newt's back seat is filled with the ever-amusing "schticks" and loads of other crap. Every bit of Newt has become my own, and I feel just about as comfortable in my car as I do in my bed. I'd even say I spend more time in Newt than I do in my bed. Is this as weird as it sounds?

Until next time, Lauren.

Fond of Love

Yes, I am going to attempt to tackle the most vast thing to ever be blogged, or for that matter, theorized about. And yes, I am probably much too tired to do so, but there's no time like the present eh?

Last night, due to a suggestion from my best friend and personal movie educator, I watched the ultimate romantic comedy, Love Actually. I didn't quite expect it to exceed the already high expectations I drew from its reputation, but to my surprise, it went above and beyond. Besides making me laugh, cry, and go "Aww!" about a million and one times, this movie flooded my mind with an immense amount of perspective.

First off, this movie taught me that love is constant. Although I do not see it in everything, or even feel it at times, it is not only there but it occupies every last square inch of space I assume is filled with air. Most of the time I feel a want for love of any sort, just to fill the void I realize that I create for myself. However love is actually the contrary. Love comes in and fills that crevasse before I really begin worrying about its emptiness. It's quite the phenomena, and before I turn this point into an impersonal cliché, I will move on.

Not only is love a constant in this inconsistent world, love is for everyone. To dip into the pool of cliché, I'd have to say that I have come to realize that love is for the rich and the poor; the pretty and the ugly; the kind and the hurtful; the happy and the sad; the important and the insignificant; the right and the wrong. And that is simply because love does not discriminate. In fact, love opens itself up as an offering to all those who will take it. I myself need to learn to take the plunge and accept all the love I take for granted.

As you may have encountered in your own life (and I certainly have in mine), love can be very complicated. But love is a different sort of complexity. It is beautifully complicated. The sort of chaotic harmony love creates - the sweet melody emerging from a rough instrument - is what makes love all that it is. Love is a separate endeavor from the rest of Earth's multitudes of struggles. It is an end that to be received, must be met by equivalent means. In other words, to get all the love you deserve, you must give the same amount back. That rule of thumb poses the question: Do we deserve what we give, or give what we deserve? Do you see how complicated it all is? But I know I will never give up my search for love or my journey of distributing it. And therein lies the beauty of love.

The reciprocation of love will probably always be a constant struggle for me, because I think I sometimes give more love than I can handle holding upon myself. It is entirely my fault that I don't consider myself so deserving, but I find so much love for others I find it hard to understand how much is left for me. Perhaps it never even gets back to me, but none of this will stand in my way. Love has a way of working things out on its own, and the only way to allow that to happen is to give love the opportunity to circulate and make its way through both my life and yours.

"The greatest thing you'll ever learn, is just to love, and be loved in return."

-Moulin Rouge

I love you, Lauren.